Humor

Con Food

Between medicine and firearms, as well as renaissance faires and sci fi/comic cons, I’ve attended a lot of conventions (both mundane and otherwise) in my time. One of the biggest things on many people’s minds at any sort of con is the food — where to find it, what sort will be available, how much it will cost, and what the quality will be.

Where a con is located will have a major impact on the availability of food. If located at a downtown convention center, all sorts of restaurants will be within a few minutes walk, while most renaissance fairs are located in more rural locations, so the faire food is all there is. The Kentucky Expo Center is fairly isolated, with nothing within walking distance.

Yesterday, while wandering the halls of the Kentucky Expo Center while it was still mostly empty, I saw a variety of food trucks and other food booths. I’m not certain how they’ll stand up to the onslaught of the tens of thousands expected through the doors over the weekend, but they’re well-spaced throughout the center, provide a good variety of choices (from Mexican to bbq, sandwiches to salads, and a few other more uncommon options, as well), and don’t seem to be exorbitantly expensive.

So far, I can wholeheartedly recommend Lil’ Orbits donuts. They’re tiny donuts, freshly-made and rolled in cinnamon sugar. They’re so light and fluffy and just melt in your mouth.

The one food truck that I wish was here was one that I saw broken down on the side of the freeway last night. It said on the side, “Waffles Worth Dying For!” and was called something along the lines of “Bacon Waffle Truck”. After we’d gone by, I kept wanting to go back and rescue it and bring it to the NRAAM with us.

Categories: Around Town, Cooking, Firearms, Humor | Tags: , | 1 Comment

Changing the Rules

Debate is a sport. It has rules. The rules are spelled out very clearly in many places, and in my one class, we were given very clear references to exactly what rules our debates would be held according to. We were even recommended to watch examples of such debates.

I still think that having been on speech and debate team for several years in high school gives me an advantage.

The big debate still isn’t for a month, but we had mini-debates this past Saturday in class. They were somewhat informal and just pitted campus against campus on some fairly simple topics. Almost no one had done a lot of research, but the 45 minutes we were given in class was plenty of time to pull things together.

My campus was given the affirmative of the question, “Resolved: The United States healthcare system is the best in the world.” Most of us could barely read that aloud with a straight face, but we had to defend it. After everyone else started groaning and saying there was no way we could do it, I said, “Exactly, so we change the rules. Redefine ‘healthcare system’ so that it becomes ‘diagnosis and treatment of disease’. Then show how the US does that better than anyone else.” And we were off to the races.

The team debating the negative never saw the switch we pulled and failed to redefine “healthcare system” back to anything else. They showed up ready to play soccer. We substitued a football and proceeded to pick the ball up and run with it while they were still trying to kick it in a straight line towards goals that had suddenly become uprights.

In addition, no one else knew what to do with their alloted time for cross-examination. I did. And given the debate set-up, ours was the second debate, and I was the last to cross in our debate, so no one else could take what I did and turn it back on us (at least not this week). Everyone else would ask a question, then let the person responding meander on and on, often not even answering the question and using up all of the time given for cross.

My cross went something like this:
You mentioned obesity. The US healthcare system does a fantastic job of treating the end results of obesity. Do you disagree?” “Well, no, but we need to educate…“*interrupted*
Thank you. You want to prevent obesity with education, but we do that already. Are you going to force people to eat the proper foods and exercise?” “Well, maybe we should…“*interrupted*
I see you want to remove the ability of people to make choices in their lives. You also mentioned the infant mortality rate in the U.S. Do you realize that this is at least partially due to women choosing to give birth at home with inadequate medical attention and untrained midwives?” “We need to educate them and make them go to hospitals…“*interrupted*
So you want to tie up all the pregnant women and throw them into ambulances to make them give birth at hospitals?!?” “Well, yes, we should.
*silence*
I see how you really feel about people’s medical choices in the US.

My time ran out shortly after that, but I was later told that the line about tying up all the pregnant women and throwing them in ambulances will probably go down as the best line said during class this semester.

Categories: Health, Humor, School | Tags: | 4 Comments

Be Careful Out There

I spent a good bit of this holiday weekend on the road. Between the BF’s car trouble and heading downstate for lunch with my parents today, I ran up several hundred miles on the interstate.

I have never seen so many police on the roads in such a short period of time. NEVER. Both in number and in type. I even saw state highway patrol sharing pass-throughs on the interstate with sheriff deputies and with local police, as if there weren’t enough places for them all to sit.

I know it’s a holiday weekend. I know they’re cracking down on drunk drivers. But 2pm on Friday? 10am on Labor Day? C’mon.

Even better was all of the drivers’ reactions to all of the police cars (and motorcycles!) on the roads. Every single cop sighted meant massive brake lights across the freeway, even if he had someone pulled over on the other side! I think the best was an obvious speed trap…4 Motor Carrier Enforcement SUVs (they’re a different color than the regular highway patrol cars), each one with an 18-wheeler pulled over, all in a line on the side of the road. Just about every single blessed car heading south slammed on his brakes.

The speed trap? On the northbound interstate.

Categories: Around Town, Humor | Tags: , | Leave a comment

Mandatory Gear

I have decided that there is something that I need to get to make my graduate school experience complete.

FLUFFY BUNNY SLIPPERS!!!

Given that the majority of my classes are online or via videoconference, I feel that attending classes in fluffy bunny slippers will make me smile and make my day complete when I have to be up at an ungodly early hour (for me) to participate in these classes.

And my feet will stay nice and toasty warm.

Categories: Humor, School | Tags: , | 1 Comment

Knock… Knock…

Wow… I still have a blog! Dunno if anyone’s still listening or not, but hi!

School has started. Finally. I’ve got to quit all of the running around and visiting friends and having fun blowing off responsibilities that I was doing all summer long (hey, why not? one last summer free of responsibility!) and buckle down now.

I’m taking 3 classes to start. Two of them are the “required” core courses that I’ll be taking in concert with everyone in my class; the other is an elective. Public health in general seems to be rather oriented towards social justice and the ideals espoused by the left. It’s going to be interesting to see how I fit in (or rather, how many ripples I stir in the pond).

On the first day, the program director wanted each of us to give an interesting fact about ourselves as we were introducing ourselves to the room. I chose to share that my hobby is long-range target shooting. I figured I might as well put that on the table, right up front. I’m pleased that no one shrieked or fainted. And when the girl next to me said that she has a 3rd degree black belt in judo, the program director said that she wasn’t going to be afraid with the two of us around. I’m thinking this maybe won’t be so bad after all.

Of course, then I open my biostats textbook, and right there in the introduction, the author starts using statistics about deaths from firearms in his very first example. *sighs* It’s going to be an interesting couple of years.

Categories: Humor, Long-term Goals, School | Tags: , | 4 Comments

*CRASH*

And there just went the majority of the NCAA brackets. Shattered by Wisconsin taking out Kentucky in the semi-final game tonight.

Now, I was one of those who did not have Kentucky winning it all. I think I had them going out a round or two ago, even. So my bracket… Well, to be honest, I had Villanova winning it all, so my bracket was bust a very long time ago.

But GO BADGERS!!!

Categories: Humor, Sports | Tags: | Leave a comment

Playing with Fire

I have a suppressor. It is new, and I’m just now getting to take it to the range to try it out.

I was recommended by the manufacturer that coating the innards with white lithium grease prior to shooting through it would make cleaning it immensely easier. I’m all for easy mode, so I went in search of this.

I started at the Big Blue Box Store and found it in the Automotive department. “Great!” I thought, “That was easy!” Then I read the can.

“FLAMMABLE!!!” in big red letters. “Hmmmm,” I thought, “this could be a problem, given the use to which I want to put it.” So I asked a random employee of BBBS if the grease itself was flammable, or if it was just the propellant. She had no idea. I have no idea why I thought she would know, but another customer recommended that I head to the auto store across the street. He said they’d be far better able to help me.

I walked into Orange Auto Store and asked for white lithium grease. I was taken to a shelf where I had several choices, but they all said “FLAMMABLE!!!” in the same big red letters, so I posed my question again.

“Is it the grease itself or the propellant that is flammable?”

Upon consultation, the four employees decided that they didn’t know, but that there was only one way to be sure….

Yep.

We opened one can and sprayed some onto a supply cart, then tried to light it on fire! (Didn’t catch. Didn’t flame up. Didn’t explode. We decided that it must be the propellant and not the grease. I love science!)

Categories: Firearms, Humor | Tags: , | 2 Comments

Kids These Days

Since my dad got his new knee, he’s been stuck over in nursing care at the big house. It’s not much fun, and he’s realized there’s a limit to how many books can be read and how much daytime TV can be watched (the upper limit of that being about zero).

So today, we imported my youngest nephew for a short time after he got out of school. Fun was had by all. Card games were played. (Grandpa came in last many times.) Nephew even beat g’pa at rock-paper-scissors a few times! Ice cream got gobbled (and got on the school sweatshirt…oh noes!), and then it was time to go home.

When mom and I were taking him home, the nephew asked, “Can we please have some music in the car?” Now, my parents never play the radio when he’s in the car, because you never quite know what you’re going to hear, but mom has a new van with a CD player and a hard drive. We’d spent earlier drive time uploading some CDs onto the hard drive, so I figured why not…

I go to turn the stereo on, and the nephew pipes up again, “Do you have any Vivaldi?”

“Excuse me, what?”

“Do you have any Vivaldi to listen to?”

“Ummm… *blink* *blink* I don’t think so, but let me look.” I started frantically searching the hard drive to see what we might have uploaded. No Vivaldi. “I’m sorry. No Vivaldi, but here, let’s try this.” I put on a strings orchestra version of “Stars and Stripes Forever”.

“I guess this is ok, but I think I would like ‘Blue Sunset’ better.” That was the song listed two higher in the list.

“You what?!? You’re killing me here, kid! But ok… ‘Blue Sunset’ it is.” And the rest of the drive, we listened to various strings orchestra versions of American composers.

Kids these days!

Categories: Family, Humor | Tags: | 2 Comments

BANNED!!!

No, not guns. Not ammo either.

Me! Henceforth and forever from attending any more basketball games at my brothers’ alma mater.

Why? “Due to multiple losses while in attendance.” Seems like every time I show up in town and head over to campus to see a game, the home team loses.

My baby brother has been threatening to ban me from attending games for a while. He quit giving me extra tickets some time ago. Today, however, was the last straw.

MY college team beat HIS college team on their home court. So now I’m banned. But he told me I’m still allowed to watch them on TV.

Categories: Humor, Sports | Tags: , | 2 Comments

Two is One…?

Entirely by accident, I seem to be practicing this theory. Either that, or I need lessons in how to shop.

I’ve been trying to lay my hands on an H&R Sportster in .22LR for a bit. I wanted a single-shot rifle as a project gun, in the end to be paired with my new suppressor. I’d even gone so far as to place an order for one at LGS, only to be told that “they’re not making those anymore”. I followed up with H&R myself, only to be told that, sure enough, they’re not making that model anymore. At that point, my search became a little more urgent.

I found another store with availability of the Sportster online, so I placed my order. Great! Wait a week for shipping, wait for the phone call, and go pick it up. Simple. No problem. Can’t miss.

Got the phone call today and went to pick it up. The guy at the gun counter handed me the rifle; I looked it over for a minute and then filled out the forms. After the transfer was completed, the guy said something about “.22 Win Mag”.

*blink* *blink* “What?”

“.22 Win Mag.”

“I thought I ordered this in .22LR.”

“Oh. Well, this is a .22 Win Mag.”

“I see that…”

“…”

So after some investigation, I’d apparently clicked on the wrong model when I ordered it. And to transfer it back and ship it back (given that it was my mistake, both in the ordering and in the not checking more carefully before I filled out the forms) would have cost half the price of the rifle. So I decided to keep this one, AND I ordered the one in .22LR before I left the store.

I should have that one in my hands in another week.

Categories: Firearms, Humor | Tags: , , | 3 Comments

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